The self con game

A con (confidence) game is an act designed to get
money or valuables. It is done by tricking you. After
the money changes hands you may never see the con
artist again. If caught at it prosecution follows.
Tricking yourself into achieving a desired result is
perfectly legal and acceptable.

Self confidence is belief in your own ability. Faced with
flying a plane or cooking a souffle with no previous
experience you probably don’t have any. No instruction
book will create it. There is a long list of things in that

The trick is in concentrating on your ability to learn.
From early childhood through the end of life we learn
what we must to survive, get along with others and
achieve wants. We experience trying, failing,
succeeding and the feelings that come with each. We
don’t have to fly a plane or cook a souffle to be
confident that we can learn how.

Fear of injury, embarrassment or commitment come
with the territory. Whether or not the attempt turns
out well we end up knowing more about us and fear
than we did before. Self knowledge improves the
chance of positive results. You can’t really enjoy the
rollercoaster until you overcome the fear and take a

Having the courage to try it and stick with it is
necessary for success. It comes from the mind. The
truth is success on learning to fly or other complicated
projects is almost never immediate. It is a series of
small advances and understanding that in the
beginning is vital.

Failure is a word other people use. What we say is I quit,
followed by a list of reasons. “This is too much trouble”,
“I’ll never be able to learn this”, “I don’t have time for all
this work”, “I don’t want it that much”. Seeing a tiny bit of
success can trigger making a list of reasons to keep
going instead.

Which list we settle on depends on our focus. The tough
exhausting training or the finish line on race day. How
hard it is or how far I have come.

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